Trash the Dress and Brides Against Breast Cancer-- A great combination

I was going to post another “How to select” article, but something came up last night on a forum to which I subscribe to that I just had to blog about. Mark Eric is a gifted photographer based in Louisiana and has been featured on Good Morning America lately with his wonderful “Trash the Dress” photo sessions as a new take on the bridal portrait. Brides dress up in their gowns one more time to take fashion style photographs in unusual situations. Many times the dress will get wet or dirty but is not ruined even though the session is called “trashing” the dress. Many people have hit his blog and others with the question, “Why trash the dress?” A charity was brought to Mark’s attention that has been near and dear to my heart for many years.

Brides Against Breast Cancer has been quietly working in the background fulfilling the wishes of terminal breast cancer patients since 1998. They have been featured in the past on Oprah, and in many national magazines. Dresses are donated to the organization, cleaned if needed, and then placed on the traveling show. Many of the gowns are new and donated by shops and still have the tags on them. Even if a dress is donated that is not in top shape, it can still be donated and turned into a beautiful quilt that can be sold to raise funds as well.

As with any charitable organization, Making Memories Breast Cancer Foundation needs volunteers, donations and assistance. They have several ways to serve including quilt making, the pink envelope project, diamonds for dreams, garden parties and the gown sale events. If your life has been touched by breast cancer, please consider how much just a little of you time can be worth. Check out their website and see what a little time or money can do for someone at the end of her life.

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Engaging Engagement

OK, I know this isn’t about venues or caterers or choosing the right vendors, but I just MUST tell you all about this young man and his apparent massive love for a young lady. They have become an Internet “phenomenon” since his elaborate and spiritual proposal in April and covered by the Atlanta Courier Journal on July 14, 2007.
Robert Gray, Jr. has set the bar pretty high for the men in Georgia, and at the rate the video and slideshow are traveling around the internet, the men of the US had better be on notice. Gray planned his proposal for more than a year and included dozens of roses (some were gold dipped), 50 family and friends, 10 hotel rooms, and prayerful consideration.

Photographer Ross Oscar Knight captured the romantic moments for Gray. According to the Atlanta Courier Journal story, the couple never intended for their private moments to be spread across the US, but the “AWWW” factor has made the term “viral” jump to mind. The video was passed from the couple, to several of the people that attended, to their friends, to other friends and over 100 million hits later, Knight had to take the video off the net because of the traffic. Knight’s photography is beautiful and emotional. He captures the moment with a photojournalistic style. His blog is insightful and visually stunning as we get to peek into this creative mind. He has now been added to my homepage.

Men can sometimes create their own stumbling block when it comes to a memorable, meaningful proposal, but it can be done. As my husband has said many times, “Men are wired to do. That’s why when it comes to shopping, men decide – I need a shirt. Go to the store. Buy a shirt.” (In his best caveman voice) Sometimes, men just need to open up to their friends and brainstorm or consult someone to give them ideas. An exercise that may help some men come out of their shells involves things like making a list of all of the things you love about your lady. Develop your own style and emotions (eek!! That word used when talking to some men is worse than a cussword in church on Sunday morning.) and if you need it ASK FOR HELP!! Whether it is from a co-worker, friend or family member, help is not a four-letter word. (well, yes it is- but not a bad one) There are certain memories that women keep. Engagement proposals are one of the dearest; make it special for her.

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Wedding vendors - Part 2

Part two of a series: Wedding Vendors- What do you know about the people you are hiring to serve you at your wedding?


This series of blogs covers key elements of vendors and what to look for when hiring. When the wedding is over and the cake and food are eaten, the tangible part of the wedding is the photos and videos. These precious memories should not be trusted to just anyone. A friend with a quality camera may be willing to memorialize your day, but the money invested in a photographer and videographer will be appreciated in the long run and may save hard feelings between friends if things do not go right.




Photographers record the wedding day in still pictures. The difference between a good photographer and a bad photographer is not measured in money, but in the quality of the pictures. I do not ever recommend going without a photographer but realize a good photographer is worth their weight in prints. Be sure to check out not only the portfolio of the photographers that you interview,but also call previous brides. If a bride is not happy with their photos, they will let you know in a heartbeat.



Videographers also record the wedding day. Be sure to verify how much footage is shot when signing the contract and what form the final product will delivered to you. A VHS tape is won't do much good when you only have a DVD player.


Copyrights are also an issue for both photographers and videographers. It is worth asking both of these professional who will retain the rights to the footage. In other words, are you going to be able to legally copy your wedding video to send a copy to your elderly grandfather that could not travel to your wedding or will you need to purchase additional copies? Will you need to track down the photographer to get more prints and how much will those prints cost? This may not seem important now, but in the future you may wish you had asked.


In the next installment: Venues

Do you know who you are hiring? Wedding vendors-part one.

Part one of a series: Wedding Vendors- What do you know about the people you are hiring to serve you at your wedding?


In the wedding industry, there are many names for many jobs. This series of blogs will cover key elements of vendors and what to look for when hiring. Hopefully, the information that I give to you will be of assistance and allow you to hire with confidence. Many people do not realize how many different vendors are used in a typical wedding day.

Wedding planner/wedding coordinator/wedding consultant/wedding designer- many in the industry use these names interchangeably. While there are subtle differences, there are differences. Many of these differences are based on the services provided.

Wedding consultants or planners may provide more information than physical services. They serve to assist with the direction of the necessities of the wedding.

• Wedding coordinators tend to take a more hands on approach to not only the wedding planning but also execution of the day by working closely with all of the vendors.


• Wedding designers are usually more interested in the look and feel of the wedding including the color scheme and design.


• Day-of coordinators are hired to manage the wedding for the day of the event. Many times they actually work for one to two weeks prior to the wedding to assure that they understand the contracted rolls of all of the other vendors.
  

An on-site coordinator (sometimes lovingly referred to as "the church lady") is hired by the venue to protect the interests of the venue. Her primary job is to keep the walls in one piece, show the venue to prospective clients, assure that the services contracted for are provided. They are lovely people in most cases that love weddings, but they are not individually contracted with the couple to provide services. The contract is with the venue. If circumstances change with the venue and the on-site coordinator leaves, any promises that you may make with her that are not in writing, may not be provided.

While these names may be used interchangeably by many people, asking someone that uses a specific name (such as wedding designer) may take offense if they are called a planner. Some vendors (such as a caterer or bridal salon associate) will use these names as add on titles for their rolls. While they may provide additional assistance with their individual portion of the wedding, rarely does this add on title replace the individual that is assigned to handle the details the day of the wedding.

There are many certification programs that are available to enterprising people wanting to break into the wedding industry. I highly recommend doing homework before jumping into this profession. For organized, creative people, it can be an outlet for the pent up energy and ideas to come to life bringing other people's dreams to reality.

In the next installment: Photographers and Videographers

Birthday parties

I don’t know why a wedding planner would put off planning a party. Maybe it’s a mental block. This previous week was one of many “week of birthdays” in my family. My niece, both of my sons, my husband’s boss, and my in-laws anniversary all fall within a six-day period. I put off the shopping for this week every year. This year is no better.

This year, my sons both have “milestone” birthdays so the parties can’t just be little get togethers. My oldest is sixteen (gulp) tomorrow. The drivers license is still two months away because he didn’t take the first test early enough, but between the girlfriends and student driving, my hair is turning gray. (OK. No one can tell yet)

My next oldest son turned thirteen. I don’t know if I am ready for two teen boys in the house. They both want freedom, but I am not ready to let them go yet.

It just wears me out. This year we are also planning a family wedding for the first week of July that I am sewing dresses, pants and shirts for the wedding party; baking the wedding cake; and co-planning with a sister. All of this on top schooling my kids, running a business and managing a chapel. SIGH. This is life. Any day that I don’t have at least twenty things on my list of to-dos is an unusual day.

AH, such is the life of an over active mind. I guess that’s why I started my business—and love it.

Rainy Days

Usually by the time June rolls around in Texas, we are out of the rain and into the hot. We have been lulled into a sense of “It won’t rain” by two years of drought. There is an old saying in Texas. “If you don’t like the weather wait a few minutes. It will change.”
There are many brides this weekend that are scrambling to find an inside venue for their ceremony or wedding. Six months ago, while we were still in the midst of the drought and young brides were dreaming of outdoor weddings. Six months ago, rain was the farthest thing from their minds. Now there is flooding in much of North Texas. Now, to walk in the park is to slosh in the mud. Pretty white dresses won’t be white for long.
I received a frantic call from a mother earlier this week. They had not seen the chapel that I manage, but knew that we were a local place and hoped that we were free. Unfortunately, we were not free, but this brings up a good point for all weddings. HAVE A BACK UP PLAN. Even if you think there is no way something could go wrong, know what can be done if something does go wrong.
Interview several providers; even if you find the one you love on the first try. Let them know up front that you are not only looking for a first choice, but also back up choices. They will appreciate the chance to serve you and if they needed and free, will appreciate that you remembered them. My job is to try to foresee issues that may arise and head them off before they ruin a wedding. A bride can do this for herself, but must use patience to avoid becoming a bridezilla.

Blank Pages

A blank page.

I can talk all day long, but put a blank piece of paper in front of me and I tend to freeze up. I think it all comes back to honors classes in school and hearing, “This could have been a little tighter on the wording.” Or “Could you expand on that thought?” I understand that the teachers were pushing me so that I could become more. I became worried about putting thoughts on paper and someone judging my thoughts. So, I began to speak. Often times I will carry a voice recorder with me in the car and just talk to myself. I have an entire novel saved in recorded voice format. Someday, when I don’t have three kids to assign and check their schoolwork (they are home schooled), when I have a little more time, (yeah right) I will publish.
How does all of this relate to wedding planning?
Many times I will get a call. “I put off finding a caterer (florist, dress-yikes!!) How do I find someone now, a month before the wedding?”
While this may be a difficult situation, it can be done. The very first thing is to STOP procrastinating!! Sit down RIGHT NOW with that blank piece of paper. What do you have? What do you need? If you need a list to check off, find one on-line. There are many wedding websites that have free planning information. If you need help get it. Mom, sister, and best friend can be enlisted to help. Wedding coordinators are also a source to call upon. While a coordinator is not free, you do not need to be rich and famous to utilize a professional. The money that you save may well pay for her services. She is being paid for her time, which means that she is making the time for your wedding that you may not have.
At any rate, get a plan in place, seek help when needed, and most of all, enjoy your wedding.